::: sick fiddy :::

yup, news has it. i'm sick. fever,phlegm and flu. maybe i got sick because i got caught in the rain. i shall not forget to leave my cap behind anymore.

missed school today. dunno wat's goin on for Marketing and ISDM. but glad that i have frens to get the notes for me. sigh.. thanks bro.

i felt like dying last night when i was attacked by a sort-of asthmatic experience.

::: if the price is right! :::

hahaha... so i heard. yup, i heard. not from the horse's mouth of course. yup. he's using her just to get back at me. isnt that horrible. well, nothing surprises me anymore. awful,awful boy he is. using a girl whom i kknown since dunno when. hahah... but i'm not gloating in happiness, though. just feel said for some people in life. i guess, i'm not the only sad girl in the world. hahahah

i noticed that alot of people are getting richer and driving rich car. i also realised that i'm not in that lot of people. oh well. i'm not sad caused i'm getting poor. i'm just sad that people are wasting money to flaunt their money. as for me, i guess it's time to fall into second best section. SBS. i'm talking about tangible stuff, by the way.

i shall not bitch anymore.




right...

::: my not so happy ending :::

the day was great. but the ending was sad.

i hope u all will take a moment in remembering my hamster, Madrid. He've moved on with the other fellow furry friends in the nether world. please forgive Madrid if he had hurt any of you before.

thank you.

::: bastard will be sent to hell, not jail :::

i dunno why, but i used to really like him as a brother-in-law. cause he's really a brother who is in law. but now, hatred runs thru his blood and mine. seriously. i dun like him anymore. not as a brother only. but also as a person. he detest me. he's the thorn growing on my flesh.

can u believe this? he sent my sis and ryan over, but he stayed downstairs waiting for my sis. this is to avoid my parents.

HALO?!!! i know my parents didnt bring you up, but neither did yours. my parents did so much for your freaking family. and this is how u repay them? by believing some ding-bang on the street? you're such an asshole.


are all men like that? don't appreciate? i'm really becoming to really hate men, unless the next man i know is the opposite. seriously. i'm not turning les or anything, but why? did God meant this to happen? But why? things were getting good. but now....

now both my brothers are staying away from my parents. i dunno abt the next one. but if i ever bring a man into this family, i just hope things will be much better than it is now.

i really hate making faces

::: hey, Fiddy :::

"hey fiddy! u cut your hair!" (zalin)

"eh fiddy, potong rambut sey." (faizah)

"eh fiddy macam spiderman nya gf ah...."(rafique)

well look, fiddy got a new hair cut because its for the production. the producers needed a new look for fiddy's character. so a hair-cut here is to show that fiddy can be a lil more fun than the last season. hee...

so anyway, in collaboration with the hair-cut, dyed my hair just now. the color came out good. Thanks MUM!!! she so nice today to do it for me. i think it's because she wants me to do it for her next time. I told u, Henna is not so lasting! oh!and keith said that my color matches my car. hahaha... u think wat?! i'm catatonia? is that how u spell her name?

have i mention that i have 3 books to be reading this weekend? hee.. but i didnt. only managed to get thru most of the introduction. but don't worry, cause fiddy is here! fiddy will do the reading soon. i think. yeah, stress is the word here. gotta ctah up fast with the books before next lesson. and also, to avoid getting fined by the librarians for late return. dammit, if only no one reserved the books. i could have gotten them to be re-new!

oh by the way, i dun look like her, for your info. she's trying to look like me. stop trying, gal. get a life. (and i'm not talking about Kirsten dunst aka spiderman's gf. i am definitely no-way looking like her)

::: married, happily ever after :::

is it so wrong to be happy? i mean now. i am happy things are right now. the stress from school coming in. Glenn Morgan and Claudio are driving me nuts. but it's ok. cause i need it. and i'm happy.

but like any happy ending, there will be a sequel. no matter what. life is never fair. God will always play a trick on us. And i'm not just talking about my God only. It's everyone's god. for those whoe don't believe, please...start believing. back before society was born, everyone blamed God for the things that happen. then science steps in. but many of those who still believe in fate by God, still exist. Like me.

back to the matter at hand, i'm not really a happy girl right now. not because of school. not because of my social life. not because of my financial difficulties. but because of the bond God created between my family and i.

i know i sound such a bad ass for saying things i shouldn't have regarding them. but we have the same blood running thru our veins. it really hurt to know when any of them is in trouble. and now, my sister is in one.

why do marriages i come to never have a happy ending? i grew up watching my dad and my mum fight in world wars each night. and don't ask me wat's the latest edition of this WW. cause i lost track. i grew up disbelieving marriages. seriously. i do. i blame my parents for it. it seems wrong, but i do. And now, my sister. i've grown old enough now to know wat is wrong and wat is right. and wat that bastard to do my sister is wrong. i don't care if he is my so-called related thru papers named Marriage Certificate with my sister. i don't care. but what i care is my sister. and Ryan.

i know i sound hateful towards them, but they are still my sisters. they watch me grow up. they backstabbed me in many ways. but because of all these backstabs, i learnt to be a better person, a better sister.

if only i could do something. i really hope to do something. but i'm helpless.i can just watch wat's gonna happen next and just share her sorrows.

as i conclude. i seriously am standing on my disbelief of marriage. i'm sorry, but too many marriages i've known of are not "happily ever after". please don't blame me. blame this god-dammit society.

::: inevitable day :::

no class today. so the fat cat decided to go gym.so i did. took the MRT today. hmm... just when i decided to take the train, things just have to happen. so my trip down to CBD was great. read my Glenn Morgan book. Didnt fall asleep. Gym was great.burned more calories that i aimed. it was the return trip that kinda delayed my trip back home.

1) had to take the longer route home cause of some disruption between toa payoh and amk station. found out later that an elderly man was killed by an approaching train at Bishan Mrt. GOSH!!!! Read it here. Well i just read the news actually. 5 minutes ago.

2) at clementi station, the driver came out of his hood because he was disturbed by the knockings of an old woman on the door.She, in return, complained to the driver that the girls from CHIJ were acting indecently in front of her and cause unpleasant feelings towards the old woman. GOSH!!!! Well i don't know exactly wat unpleasant "events". i was reading my Glenn Morgan.

3) Met some dingbangs from the past. "Hey, Fiddy!!! Amacam kau? Dah lama tak nampak!" "Duh." "kau buat ape sekarang?""school. well hey, here comes the train. gotta go."" yeah okok... contact aku tau!" "Ermm..sure." Don't ask me who was it. cause he was from my skating past and god knows his name.

Rained cats and dogs by the time i reached Marsiling. Checked the time. 240pm. hmm.. called my mam and offered to pick her up. so i walked so carefully, not to dirty my pink Zara curdoroy to my car park.

sigh... i sure miss taking the train.

::: boring... :::

yeah, so i passed the BarNone thingy and went to the chalet. but for a true fact, BarNone thingy was cancel due to some stuff at home. So..the chalet. it was crowded.... with Silians. mistake siak.... should have just stayed home and spend time on my Kirsten Book. went there like 10pm, left the place at 1230.

the only exciting part of the chalet is the end product. as i was driving some guy driving in a WRX, actually smiled at me while at Elias Road traffic lights. hahaha.... i just smiled back. nice car, by the way. oh well, yes... i'm that pathetic when it comes to excitement.

it's such an odd day actually. i was at home whole day, while my mum was out whole day. hmm.. usually it's vice versa. oh well, like the goodies she bought. shall attack them tomorrow. hee...

::: Nice party :::

Ahh... Gy's chalet ended. it was nice. alot of chilling done. and dead people sleeping on the porch. some got lucky i suppose. some got laid. some got nothing. and some are fat bitches. hahaha... i'm so glad i've past that era of being fat and despised. beer was great. but didnt had the chance to try out the Mirnoff. food was great too. but i think, the best part of the chalet is the talking cock session. yes, talking cock. Great Party, Gy. even though i lost my car's chin. but it's ok. it's wrecked anyway.

Came home at 6am this morning to send my grannie and mum to Harbour Front. hmmm... i kinda got a little culture shock to actually see alot of men going to Batam this weekend. And now,i'm definitely not surprise to see more younge men going there. they actually outnumbered the old ones. But wat's the kick anyway? The sex there? The Keropok? The Lulur? i mean like, wat the hell?!

Raced with Santa fe after that. at losing point, she claimed that it's a new car, so it cant run. Right...... Also, it's not a performance car. Right.... I guess it's true on the part that the car doesnt play the only role on the road. it's the driver.

speaking of driving, still haven pay my fine. and of course, my first 3 points...........

it's almost 5 now. Still undecided on wether to help my bitchy sis at her chalet. it's Silians' Nite by the way. anyone from Siling Sec batch 1992-1995? come down, yeah? Downtown East. Block H. So anyway, should i go?got a better offer tonight actually. BarNone. hmm... really tempting. but hey, school starts next week. I gotta make use of the time left.. hee...

So the wild sister now sits at home wondering wat to wear, where to go. hmm... hmm.. sounds like i'm single forthe night. any takers?hee..

:::New me??? :::

i dun think so.

so anyway, made a little changes of the skin here. hopefully it looks friendly enough.

Oh, just got back from Gy's chalet few minutes ago. Has fun. Will put up the pictures after tml's bbq. yup, another bbq. great stuff dude. and thank god, i stopped myself from another can. otherwise i might have been stopped by an officer on the way back. hee...

oh, Barnone this saturday, anyone? Does anyone know wat's the limit of Ladies age? i scared i might be too young. ;) hee...

oh, mum not talking to me. nothin new. she's totaly brainwashed by my sisters. no surprise. thanks girl. yeah right. i hate u alot. oh well, just have to carry on making faces.

::: great POPULAR sale :::

hahaha....
spent like mad at Popular sale today. as u all know, Lil' Miss Fiddy cant stand sales. Cause she just have to start grabbing everything. BUT!! i managed to get only the ones i need, not the ones i want. Got for Ryan and Oni books too for the next semester.


One thing i realise about myself is, i love them too much. Love them too much that i end up only buying books for them! hee... but hey, they both have very busy parents. so i guess being an aunt, i should do my part. Besides, i want them to excel. For ryan's case, it's never too early to start learning the fact thatnow it's not "A stands for Apple", but... "A stands for Ambition".

Gosh, syllabus sure have changed since my time....

::: yipee:::

great, lost my old template. freak.

::: Some late pictures :::

i know the bbq has ended like so long ago.... so here are some of them.

hope u dun see yourself inside.
oh, yeah... can anyone help me? how to upload a mpeg format to the net and using html to paste the link here? cause i wanna upload the "hidden" music video of rafique and zul's performance.

::: so things go back to the way it was :::

what i meant is, nothing seems to go right for me. therefore, things has to back to the way it was...ruining my life.

arghh... great bad news in the morning. my sis called to let me know that i've got a fine. great. 3point!!!!!! wat the hell!!!! just for parking for 5 mins at AA. that's it man, tt's the last time i'm going AA.

damn u, traffic police.

::: now it's wild to mild :::

as many of you who know me weel, i am one un-satisfied girl. anything at all.

but not today. i'm satisfied about something. and grateful too.reached my goals. so damn-freaking happy about it. really.

i pity some of my frens though. in fact, really feel bad for them.so i cant share my joy with them. what i can share is knowledge for the next season. but...overall, we're still frens.

to everyone who gotten their results:
Hope it went well. Will see ya next season.